What I’d Tell Myself as a New Leader

What I’d Tell Myself as a New Leader

A Birthday Week Reflection on Growth, Grace, and Getting It Wrong

It’s my birthday this week.

And while I’m not about to give you a list of “top lessons at this age” (because, let’s be honest, the number isn’t the point)… I will say this:

The longer I lead, the more I realize how much leadership shapes you—quietly, constantly, and usually through the hard stuff.

So today, I want to speak less like an author or a coach, and more like someone who's been in your shoes. Who’s made the missteps, questioned their own instincts, and learned things the long way around.

Here’s what I’d go back and tell myself as a new leader. And maybe, just maybe, it’s something you need to hear this week, too.

1. Stop trying to outrun doubt—learn to work with it.

You’re going to have days when you question yourself. That doesn’t mean you’re a bad leader—it means you care. Doubt isn’t always a warning sign. Sometimes, it’s a mirror asking you to slow down and get honest.

2. People don’t remember your strategy as much as they remember how you made them feel.

You’ll spend hours perfecting plans, frameworks, and timelines. But what sticks with your team is how they felt seen, supported, and challenged around you. That’s where trust is built. That’s where loyalty lives.

3. It’s okay to change your mind.

There’s strength in reconsidering, in saying “I got that wrong,” in evolving. Stubborn leadership isn’t brave—it’s brittle. Flexible leadership? That’s where real influence begins.

4. You’re allowed to grow too.

I used to think leaders had to have it all figured out. Now I know: your growth doesn’t end when you earn the title—it starts there. Give yourself room to evolve. Your team will be better for it.

This Week, I Hope You’ll Reflect Too

Take five minutes.
Ask yourself:
👉 What has leadership taught me this year?
👉 What am I proud of—even if no one else sees it?
👉 What would I go back and tell myself from a year ago?

Because you’ve come further than you think.

Lead Forward by Looking Inward

We don’t talk enough about how personal leadership is.
It’s not just about influence or results—it’s about how you show up for people, and how you show up for yourself.

In Lead Forward!, I wrote about these lessons because I lived them. I still do.

So this week, I’m not giving you more to do. I’m giving you permission to pause, reflect, and lead with a little more grace, for yourself, and for your team.

I’ll see you next Monday. But for now, I’ll be celebrating another lap around the sun—grateful for the growth, the hard-won lessons, and the leaders like you who keep showing up.